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All of the jokes on this page pertain to “Probability.” This includes topics such as the Maximum Likelihood Estimator and probability in general.
P1Maximum Likelihood EstimatorKnock! Knock!
Who’s there?
Em who?
MLE! The Maximum Likelihood Estimator!

** Many thanks to Gavin Desir for sending me this joke from the University College in London, England, via one of the last transcontinental telegrams. **
P2ProbabilityIt is 1941 and the Germans are bombing Moscow. Most people in Moscow flee to the underground bomb shelters at night, except for a famous Russian statistician who tells a friend that he is going to sleep in his own bed, saying that “There is only one of me, among five million other people in Moscow. What are the chances I’ll get hit?”
He survives the first night, but the next evening he shows up at the shelter. His friend asks why he has changed his mind. “Well,” says the statistician, “there are five million people in this city, and one elephant in the Moscow Zoo. Last night, THEY GOT THE ELEPHANT!”

** This should be a staple story for every probability course. It is almost as if the Probability Gods talk to one another after every occurrence of an event. The same individual sent me this that related the story about shopping for gourmet brains and insists on remaining anonymous. A big thanks, anyway! **
P3ProbabilityAn undergraduate psychology major was totally hung over for the final exam in abnormal psychology. He was somewhat relieved to find that the exam was a true/false test. He had taken a basis stat course and did remember his professor once performing a coin flipping experiment. Since his brain was pretty mush he decided to flip a coin he had in his pocket to get the answers for each questions. The psychology professor watched the student the entire two hours as he was flipping the coin…writing the answer…flipping the coin….writing the answer, on and on. At the end of the two hours, everyone else had left the room except for this one student. The professor walks up to his desk and angrily interrupts the student, saying: “Listen, it is obvious that you did not study for this exam since you didn’t even open the question booklet. If you are just flipping a coin for your answer, why is it taking you so long?”
The stunned student looks up at the professor and replies bitterly (as he is still flipping the coin): “Shhh! I am checking my answers!”

** This is real cute but unfortunately I don’t have an attribution for it. Can anyone claim it? **
P4ProbabilityA man who travels a lot was concerned about the possibility of a bomb on board his plane. He determined the probability of this, found it to be low but not low enough for him. So now he always travels with a bomb in his suitcase. He reasons that the probability of two bombs being on board would be infinitesimal.
** Contributed by Eugene A. Berg–Thanks! Taken from Innumeracy by John Allen Paulos.**
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