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The jokes on this page are actually quotes.
Q1Quote“July 4… Statistics show that we lose more fools on this day than all other days of the year put together. This proves, by the number left in stock, that one Fourth of July per year is inadequate, the country has grown so.”
** A big thank you to Jack Barnette from the University of Iowa College of Medicine for this humorous quote by Mark Twain. **
Q2QuoteAs Twain DIDN’T say: “liars, outliers, and out-and-out liars!” (Nor did Disraeli…)
** Thanks to Robert Dawson for submitting this twist on an old standard. **
Q3Quote“Anyone who cannot cope with mathematics (statistics is not fully human). At best he is a tolerable subhuman who has learned to wear shoes, bathe, and not make messes in the house.”
** This is a quote by Robert Heinlein with the parenthetical expression added by me. The question is how do these subhumans view mathematicians and statisticians? **
Q4Quote“My life is an experiment I never had a chance to properly design.” — Diana Ballard
** Thanks to Diana for relating to all my readers her closely held secret. My question to Diana is, “What design would you now use if you had a chance to start your life over again? **
Q5Quote“It has now been proven beyond a doubt that smoking is the major cause of statistics.” — Author Unknown
** Huh? It seems to me that I recall hearing another version of this statement. However, this certainly supports my opening paragraph in the Gallery that gazillions of statistics are created every day. Many thanks to Michele McIndoe for sending me this quote. **
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